Monday, 25. January 2010
Author: Colin Hall
OK, it’s summer and you feel the need to socialise. You have some money to burn and you’re in the mood for a party. I’m a lover of the party format, it breaks down barriers really quickly and is a great way to introduce new friends into the established mix. Over the years I’ve put together some great party’s and below I’ve listed a few tips that you might want to consider when planning your next big party. It’s not just a ‘do this, do that’ kind of list. It’s more a list of what matters and what doesn’t and what to not get stressed about.
I hope it helps.
Planning ahead …
If you’re anything like me, your decision to have a big party will come as a flash of ‘inspiration’ … usually after a few drinks and a phone call from a friend. This can be great, but equally it could be disastrous. The planning of a good party is a coincidence of timing, atmosphere and people mix and the key is to hit that mix right. So, when you get that call from an old friend that you haven’t heard from for many years, my advice would be to stem the urge to say ‘we’ll throw a big party’. With old friends I suggest that you have a little get together first … just to test the water. Friends are strange characters, they can change … drastically. So be prepared for your friend to have changed beyond all recognition. Sometimes this can happen because they have been through something traumatic in their lives, they may have come into money and become awful snobs, they might even have developed a horrendous social or political bile … so best to check before introducing them to your hand picked mixture of friends.
Another quick point to make is that the usual reason that a friend will have a completely altered personality is because they have recently had a baby. If this is the case [prepare yourself, I'm going to say something harsh now] DO NOT INVITE THEM! New parents are renowned for being a drag at parties … I’m sorry, but there it is. Either they are both on tender hooks from the moment they arrive or the husband is so eager to get stoned that he hits the gin straight away and they are on the brink of a divorce by the time everyone else is starting to loosen up. Take my advice, if you must go out with friends who have kids [and I try to avoid the scenario until the kids are nicely grown up] go to a restaurant for lunch and be prepared to check the kiddies menu before you go. Oh and be prepared for them to focus all of their attention on their kids, the failings of other kids and the reason why you don’t have kids … kids, kids, kids!
Planning ahead – The guest list …
You will have [I'm assuming] already have a regular bunch of mates, both occasional or regular, that get together once in a while and have a good time. This is a good start, write them on to this list. This part is a bit like writing a recipe for soup and we can refer to our regular friends as the ‘Stock’.
Our stock is a flavourful base of spice and seasoning that we know work nicely together. They will have previously witnessed each other in embarrassing situations, danced together, eaten in each others presence and have a knowledge of successful topics of conversation. I have found that friends tend to drift together and subsequently drift apart without having to have fallen out. These people are great when planning a big party … call them all.
One thing that must be considered early when planning a big party is choosing a time and place that is going to be convenient for your ’stock’ guests. You will have some friends whose attendance ensures that the party goes with a bang … call them first and plan your party around their availability. It sounds trite, but these are the major herbs in your soup mix and without them you will spend time and money on staging a bland soup [and we don't want that].
Once you have an agreed time, that both suits you and your primary guests, you can start to call the other names in your stock. When approaching them with the dates, make it clear that this was the only time that could be planned. A good excuse is forthcoming building works or convenient breaks in your holiday schedule. Don’t be too precise with your excuse, as you might be caught out at a later date. Keep in mind, when lying to your friends, that it is all being done with their enjoyment in mind. Allow yourself a self-appreciating smile when your guests ask you if ’so & so’ is coming 
With the stock on the boil you may now turn your attention to the experimental side of your recipe. These guests should be invited in the hope that we may create some, previously undiscovered, interesting highlight or spark in our party mix. It’s how your current stock has been developed and without new flavours the stock can become stale … and we don’t want that!
Let’s say it’s been one month since your groups last big get together and three months since you held the reins in deciding the party format and guests. You need to show your worth as a member of this group and prove your value in keeping the parties interesting and fresh. This means that you have to invite interesting new people to your party. In the three months since you have held your last party your time should not have been wasted. You should have kept active socially, jumping on opportunities to meet and get to know new people. From these new people a few will stand out as perfect for your latest big party plan. Some will feel totally wrong and others will be neither here, nor there. I would suggest ignoring the bland and inviting both the good and the bad to your latest bash. The bland are of no use to anyone, but even the obnoxious can be fun when surrounded
You should consider anyone that that impresses you as potential experimental guests. I have met people for the first time and invited them to my parties immediately. Sometimes people stand out as special and you should not let social conditioning stand in the way of you developing a friendship. Whether at work, leisure or even on your holidays, keep your social mix in mind and always take down numbers from people who excite you.
A quick note on how to inform people of your up-coming party.
Never send invitations unless the occasion warrants it (i.e. Weddings, christenings etc). You should always call your guests in person, giving them plenty of time and explaining the exact circumstances and your expectations of them. It is very important to let your guests know if they are expected to bring anything, wear a particular style of clothing or even stump up for the cost of a band. Let them know these things as soon as possible and you will give them plenty of time to get used to the idea. My own favoured method is to say “Just bring yourselves … everything else will be catered for”. This may sound flashy, but even if you do tell people to bring a bottle you still have to cater for them not doing so … so why stress about it.
Also, give exact times for your party. Some of your friends will be great welcomers, so invite them earlier and let them know why your doing this. Complimenting them will ensure their compliance. “Your conversation is legendary, so insightful and intelligent … I’d love it if you could come a little early and help the party to get going” … let’s face it I’d fall for it
A little note regarding the ages of your guests.
I would say that it doesn’t matter, but I think it is important to keep the age peripherals at bay when planning a successful [big] party. The young are prone to getting drunk quickly and the elderly are prone to lecturing. Stick to ages between 20 and 60 and you can’t go wrong. This doesn’t mean that people outside of these ages get struck from your social list, they just get moved to the more private and personal get-togethers (restaurants, pubs and evenings in).
How many guests should I invite?
Obviously this depends on the space you have available. The key is to estimate your space to person ratio and add 20% to the number. Keep in mind that there will be some guests that cry off at the last minute and usually they will do this in couples, so it doesn’t take long before your numbers are starting to dwindle. As an example, if you plan to hold a party in your living room, dining room and kitchen and you estimate that you could cram 40 guests into this space, just invite 50. Even if they all turn up there will be those who want to stand outside and smoke, those who prefer to stand provocatively on the staircase and of course the constant flow to and fro to the cloakroom(s).
As a guiding principal, more guests is better than not enough.
Well, that’s it for the Guest List section of this guide to planning a big party. I’ll be discussing the actual mechanics of party planning, including food, wine, music and how to maintain the fun levels, in my next episode. Keep me in mind if you are planning a party … I’m not averse to travelling hundreds of miles to meet new people.
Thanks for reading
Colin Hall ( Web Designer, Abstract Photographer, Jazz Collector and Professional Guest)
Article Source: http://www.articlesbase.com/social-marketing-articles/a-guide-to-planning-a-big-party-part-1-the-guest-list-1754932.html
About the Author:
Colin Hall is a Norwich Web Designer and SEO who specialises in bringing life back to failing websites and helping the smaller websites to compete in very competitive markets. His wife Beverley offers Norwich Accounts and Bookkeeping Services to all of Norfolk.
